Kiwa Louise Jane – A Life Full of Love
As told by mum Jess.
Kiwa Louise Jane was born on the 10th of March at 24+5 in Middlemore hospital after a spontaneous preterm labour (we still don’t know why she arrived early, but she was just so eager to meet us all). She weighed a tiny 670grams and was the cutest little baby I’d ever seen, and she was all mine.
We had a lot of ups and downs in the first couple of weeks; it really is true when they say the NICU journey is like a roller coaster and one of the hardest things you’ll ever go through in your life.
At 11 days old, Kiwa needed an emergency operation for her perforated bowel. This was a success, and she made it through the massive operation and recovery like the little fighter she was.
This operation meant she had a stoma and would have another op closer to her due date to close the bowel back up. We moved between Middlemore and Auckland hospitals over the next few months but spent the last big chunk of our time in Auckland.
Over the following months, our little girl went through so much and proved time and time again that she may be small, but her strength was mighty, she was our little warrior. We were so lucky to have so much love and family support around us, and it really is what got us through this journey. Kiwa was always having stories read to her, daily kangaroo cuddles and all she knew was laughter and love.
Near the end of May it was time to close up her stoma and this was such a huge milestone for her and for us, everything was looking really positive. This second operation was another success and after a few weeks of recovery and getting back on track with her feeding, we were back off to Middlemore and closer to home again. This is where our world was tipped upside down.
On the 10th of June, Kiwa got an infection of NEC and passed away very suddenly in the early hours of the morning. “I’m sorry, there is nothing more we can do” are the words that are etched into my mind forever.
We didn’t get the happy ending where we walked out of the hospital with our baby girl in her car seat, ready to start the rest of our journey at home but what a special journey we did have together. Those 3 months with Kiwa and in NICU have changed my life forever. I had never seen a premature baby before my own and didn’t even know the NICU world existed.
We miss Kiwa every minute of every day and the ache in our hearts for her will be with us for the rest of our lives. We will never move on, but we will move forward, for her.
She was so loved, wanted and what a gift she was to us. I will keep her memory alive by always sharing her name, her story, and to raise awareness of the realities that happen in NICU.
Thanks so much for sharing your personal story!
We get a lot of positive feedback from families in a neonatal unit who read these stories and feel strength, hope and positivity knowing that they are not alone going through these experiences and feeling certain emotions.
If you would like to discuss sharing the story of your neonatal journey, we’d love to hear from you.
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If you want to help our support of families going through the stress and anxiety of a neonatal journey, you can donate via the link below.
- The Little Miracles Trust provides support to families of premature or sick full-term babies as they make their journey through Neonatal Intensive Care, the transition home, and onwards. We do not receive any Government funding and are entirely reliant on the generosity of individuals, companies and organisations in the form of donations, value-in-kind donations, grants, sponsorship and fundraising events to supplement operating costs and fund our services and initiatives.
- As we are a registered charity (CC56619) with Charities Services New Zealand we will send you an IRD compliant tax receipt – this will happen automatically by return email.